When you go through a divorce it feels like you are grieving a death. Basically you are. A divorce is the death of a marriage. It takes time to “get through it”. You need to grieve.

If you have been divorced awhile, you may be ready to start dating again. Before you start to take this important step you need to do some evaluating. Believe it or not, soon you will be ready to find your soul mate!

Do Some Evaluating

• How long have you been divorced?
• Are you kids comfortable with you starting to date?
• Do you feel ready to get back into dating?
• Are you done grieving the loss of your marriage?

Figure Out Your Approach

If you do start dating are you going to be open about it or keep it a secret from your children until you find some one that you want to be serious with? I have seen people take both of these paths. In my opinion, being open from the start is better.

You may be opposed to this at first, but it really does ease them into the whole process. When a parent keeps it from them and all of a sudden is like “WHAM! This is my new boyfriend/girlfriend.” It’s a lot to handle at once.

You need to start dating! How is that going to happen? Are people already trying to fix you up? Do you have someone in mind already that you are interested in? Would you prefer to join some kind of dating service?

This should be an exciting time for you. You might not have been on a date in a long time, but it will all come rushing back. It’s good to get out and meet new people even if nothing develops romantically. You can never have too many friends.

Look at this time as a positive learning experience. You need to keep living for yourself and your kids. And one more thing…. Are you ready to find your soul mate?

Len :: Mar.18.2008 :: Caring for Yourself After Divorce ::

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