There are many reasons that people get divorced.  It could be there is abuse, lying, they “fell out of love” or my favorite, adultery.  If you are reading this then you probably have been cheated on.  It may be the main cause of the break up of your marriage or it may not be, but it is one of the most horrible feelings in the world, right?  

No matter what your role in the divorce, cheating is never okay.  Everyone is responsible for their own actions.

If your spouse was caught cheating, chances are he was defensive about it.  You may have received an apology, but I’m sure they had a “good reason”  why they cheated.  You were to blame right?

This is where it would be healthy for you to do some reflecting.  Were there signs of infidelity that I over looked?  Did I choose to ignore it? There are a million questions that you could ask yourself, but the main one that you should ask yourself is what kind of person did I marry?  Probably a selfish person that you thought you could change.  That is always a mistake. 

You can’t change someone.  It doesn’t matter how hard you try.  If someone is inherently selfish, they probably always will be.  Make this a huge learning lesson in your life.  If you don’t like the person you see 100% as is, then move on, because that is who they are and who they will be! Period!

Len :: May.14.2008 :: Caring for Yourself After Divorce ::

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